[unclefather]

me sneaking to the kitchen at 3 am to make some pizza rolls 

[oamisoa]

I love it when people tell me about me because I have no idea who I am

[unclefather]

me running out of the room really fast after i turn off the light because a monster is chasing me

[maryblewberrii]

All the porn getting erased on December 17th

[3rdeyechakra]

reblog to shove a white twink

[taakoposting]

Im just fucking sitting…. keep scrolling

[zenyattasperceptrons]

me: gets a solid 8 hrs of sleep

me: wakes up exhausted

me: ok first of all

What did the cold and angry man have for dinner?

[reallyfunnyshortjokes]

A BrrrrGrrrrr.

How do you get Trump to change a lightbulb?

[reallyfunnyshortjokes]

Tell him Obama put it in.

What currency do they use in outer space?

[reallyfunnyshortjokes]

Starbucks.

What did one bone say to another bone?

[reallyfunnyshortjokes]

Let’s meet up and share a joint.